Spiritual Selfishness

Laurel D. Buckingham · Tidal Church Moncton · November 24, 2024 · You Can't Talk About That series

Laurel D. Buckingham looks at Jesus praying "not My will" in Matthew 26 and Philippians 2. He shows that the church exists to reach the lost, so Christians must lay down personal preferences and comfort, and go a little further.

More from Laurel D. Buckingham · The You Can't Talk About That series

Topics: Mission & Outreach, Discipleship

Transcript

[0:00] If this were the last sermon that I ever was to preach, this would be it. And it could be the last sermon at 85 years of age. Who knows? But I just feel it is so desperately needed and critical, not so much for this congregation, but for the many places that I'm speaking and where I go to try to help churches to move on to the next level. In fact, this is so important that I thought about writing the message out and reading the message, but then I thought there'd be some of you who wouldn't hear a thing I said. You'd be asleep. So I'm gonna somehow try to get everything that needs to be said the way it needs to be said across so that we can fully understand what it means to connect the dots so that the church can reach its fullest potential and be everything that God intended for His church to be.

[1:09] Now, I have been for the last 11 years preaching just about every weekend in some place, somewhere in the land of Canada, and across Canada and the United States, primarily doing consultations in churches. Next weekend I will be at an Anglican church that wants to reach the lost and wants to go forward in St. John, starting on Friday over the weekend. And so as I think about the great need, this tragedy that I find everywhere I go, I walk into these places that almost always have had better days.

[1:54] They've been in decline. A man came to me after the first service and talked about a church that he attended. Now it is only about 10% of what it used to be because it's very clear that people were not willing to connect the dots in order for that church to be everything that God intended for His church to be. But that means you and I being everything that God intends for us to be, because we make up the church. And so we see bald heads, not nothing so bad about a bald head, gray hair, and very few young people, where generation after generation has been missed because of people unwilling to connect the dots and wanting to remain in their comfort zone.

[2:51] They want things the way they always have been. So today I'm hoping that the light will come on for everybody, and I think the light has already come on for most of you, but it needs to be reaffirmed because here's the tragedy of what I'm talking about here today. We can connect the dots one day and feel like we've done what we're supposed to do, but there's just this terrible tendency to revert and want to go back to what is comfortable for us. And it ends up being too much of the time, me, me, me. Now, where churches are connecting the dots, and this would be one of them, there is blessing, there is joy, there's excitement, there's anticipation.

[3:43] People want to come to church. I know people who get caught speeding coming to this church, coming to this church. Well, they're just so excited to get here. There's no wonder they're speeding. They want to be in the church, and they come with smiling faces and want to mingle with their friends and hear the message preached because they have connected the dots. Some people just go because they're duty bound to go and there's no other motivation for going. And those people who have connected the dots, let me tell you, in their personal life and in their church life, they are full of joy and expectation, and they're thrilled to have connected the dots and see what God does when they are willing to connect the dots.

[4:31] Now, one of the things that's troubling me a little bit this morning is I don't usually even have notes when I preach, but today I'm so concerned that this message get across that I'll be a little more glued to my notes. Now if that gets boring for some people, if you see somebody that looks like they're praying for me, would you give them a hard poke in the ribs? Because this is so critical. We want everybody to get the message and understand what it means to connect the dots. The tragedy is, and boy, this is a deception of deceptions because it's so counterintuitive. So many people think they're connecting the dots when push comes to shove.

[5:19] They're really not. But they are deceived. They're self-deceived into thinking that they are connecting the dots. So we need to remember one basic principle, a biblical principle. The church is not for the people in the church. If we are left to our own devices, our tendency is to think it's all about us enjoying ourselves and us being ministered to and all that needs to be done for us. Here's the purpose of the church, and it's very biblical. The purpose of the church is to equip the people in the church by helping them to connect the dots and whatever else needs to happen.

[6:08] Equip the people in the church so that we can be a force, an army, to reach the people out there who are outside the church. What does the Bible say? Jesus said, "I will build My church, and the gates of hell will not prevail against it." What does that mean? The church will be so actively engaged without any hindrances, selfish interests of any kind, that they will be willing to reach out to the people out there, many of them living in a living hell. And many of them need to see the gospel breakthrough and the gates of hell be broken down so that we can effectively be what God has called His church to be and what He's called this church to be.

[7:12] But that's going to mean connecting the dots. Now, I thank God, and I tell you, I'm probably the most thankful person in here, that this church has a visionary leader who is willing to do whatever's necessary to reach out to the lost world. Jim Clements, our leader, and the team that works with him and a great core of people that believe that it can be done and the church can be as relevant today as it's ever been in the history of the world. Now, everywhere. Everywhere you go, people are making themselves feel better where the church is dying and declining by thinking most churches are.

[7:58] And so that makes 'em feel a little better about themselves. But lemme tell you this, not all churches are dying and declining. The ones where there's a group of people who understand what it means to connect the dots and they're doing whatever it takes to not be all about themselves, but about that lost world out there that Jesus died for. Lemme tell you something, some of those churches are booming in Atlantic Canada and going forward like the church has never done in Atlantic Canada in history. Why? Because they believe it can be done. They take steps of faith to put it into action. And then God blesses His church.

[8:46] There are three kinds of followers as Christians, people, I believe, who are born again. There are people who are followers. That's the extent of it. There are some others who are faithful followers. But then the kind of church that goes and grows and glows to the glory of God is a church where there are not only faithful followers and followers, but they are full followers because they've understood and learned what it means to connect the dots and be a full follower of Jesus. When our people, any church anywhere, when people get on that page of being a 100% full follower of Jesus and all that, that means sometimes it has to be explained for people to get it and understand it.

[9:44] Then that will be a dynamic, alive, energized, and an innovative, creative place where they're reaching out to people of all ages and they're able to see the church be everything that God meant for His church to be. Now, let me explain that a little bit. Please look in your Bibles and on the screen to Matthew 26 and verse 39, and we see where Jesus, it says, went a little further and He prayed because what He had to face, believe it or not, was not easy. Now you say, "He was divine, so it wouldn't have been any problem." That's not so. He was as much man as He had never been God and as much God if He'd never been man.

[10:34] So it was Adam as a man. He had to suffer rejection, pain, hatred, torment, physical and mental and all the other ways that you could suffer. And He did it as an example to us. He went a little further and, He said, in facing what would be more difficult. Now listen, not any of us have had to face this yet here in this part of the world, other parts I have. None of us have had to face death. And yet we get tripped up over stupid stuff that keep us from being a full follower of Jesus Christ because it's not comfortable for us. But Jesus said, and this is when we really get to something that makes the big difference in our spirit and in our freedom and in our joy and in our blessing, is when we say, as a full follower, "Not my will."

[11:39] That's what Jesus said. When doesn't it make sense? If I'm going to be a full follower of Jesus, that I will say never, never, never about me and my will. So we see what that means and that may mean something affecting our comfort. There's a great church that I'm familiar with. The pastor's name is Matt Chandler, that was dying, almost ready to close his doors. He went there to pastor the church. They'd done the same old, same old, same old forever and ever. And it was just, it was declining like crazy.

[12:26] And so he knew that there had to be a come to Jesus kind of a conversation about going forward. And so one of the older deacons in the church said, "Sir, I don't care what you do, as long as it's not sinful, if it can help us get more people to Jesus." Isn't that a wonderful attitude? You don't have to clap, but I'd want to soak in some of this. Put it this way. If we're not willing to change, those who are not willing to change in order to connect the dots, to connect with the culture of the people out there that need to be reached for Jesus today, those who reject change are the architects of decay.

[13:13] And I see it happening all over Atlantic Canada, just about wherever I go to try to help to see things get turned around. So for Jesus to connect the dots, it was going a little further in order to connect the dots, going a little further from our own selfishness, which raises its ugly head sometimes when we don't even realize it, from our own selfishness to total submission. He said, "Not my will." And He did what He said and He got alone with God to hear what He needed.

[13:59] Now we get tripped up over the stupidest things. We don't like the lighting, we don't like the volume. You know, in today's world, we're gonna reach young families and young people. The volume's gotta be so loud, it's hitting you in the chest. So I say, bring it on if it can help us reach more people for Jesus. And everybody said, "Amen." Oh, hallelujah. We got one person who said that. But anyway, they get tripped up over preaching styles and all kinds of. I remember when we did the same thing you guys have recently done by going to two services. We had those black covers over the seats and there was one dear rebellious lady, she was not going to sit anywhere else, but she would pull up that black, she would sit there no matter what anybody had.

[14:52] We had a conversation and she didn't sit there anymore. But can you imagine just something that would be as small and as stupid as that being troubling to somebody going a little further, connecting the dots for the sake of what we're trying to accomplish and doing whatever has been done to get it accomplished? And yet it's those, they say, the foxes, little foxes spoil the vine. Something that is our preference. Now let it be clear, it is never ever about compromising the message. It's the methods that have to be changed.

[15:40] As long as we are connecting with the culture of the day without compromising with the culture of the day, then we can see the church go forward. And it's so important that we understand what it is to be full followers. Now, if you're being bothered by what I'm saying, sure as the world, you're the one of the people that need to connect the dots and realize there's something I need to do beyond what I'm doing in order to see things. Go ahead. Listen, I said earlier, and I gotta tell you this, about the church that is alive. I preached in Maine last week at six times in two days at a college, a great Christian college over there. And the president of the institution was also the pastor of a church about a mile away.

[16:28] I walked down to see that facility. They have over a thousand people in attendance. And I looked it up and according to Dr. Google, y'all know him, there were 1,600 people in that community and this church has over a thousand people in attendance. But I'll tell you what, they are doing the things to connect the dots. They're doing things like you wouldn't believe. I saw the great education wing, three stories high. They had playgrounds for the kids. These, all these slides and all that, two on one different sides of the building that went three stories. Those kids would wanna go in there and have a great time and enjoy themselves. What's wrong with that? If they can hear the message of the gospel.

[17:16] So how do we get there? There's steps, and these are the three steps that we need to take. We need to get in that place of going a little further so we can connect the dots so that we will pay the price of going a little further in order to connect the dots. And then we will experience the peace that comes when we're willing to go a little further in order to connect the dots. And we will get over our selfish interest. Because sometimes it takes really getting our knees and praying, God, what's in me that's causing me to be bothered by whatever's going on. And we have to get rid of our selfishness and, submit to His purpose and will. You know, I had problems with that.

[18:03] Really did. I used to come in here every Sunday morning for years and years and years dressed in a suit, a tie, cufflinks, puff. And I thought that was the way it's supposed to be done because that's what commands authority or respect or whatever it was. And then they started dressing down, and like they do. And my word, I thought, what in the world is going on? I'm not going to do that. What's that all about? My selfish interest that affected my comfort zone. And if I could dress up today, that's what I like. But I had to figure out why is this. It's so that the people who don't have that kind of attire and the people who don't wanna be in that kind of attire, that don't know Jesus as Savior, they'll feel comfortable coming into the church of Jesus Christ and be converted, receive Christ as Savior because they give up a little something that is so crazy that it shouldn't even be considered.

[19:07] Now I haven't got to the torn jeans yet and the cap, but who knows? We'll see what happens. But whatever it takes, as long as it's not contrary to the Word of the living God. They used to have the throne seats on the platform. Somebody wouldn't even know what I'm talking about, where the pastors always sat on the platform. I remember, I can't believe this about myself. I remember when they first started sitting down among the people, and nobody, no chairs on the... how can they do that? What's going on here, that's wrong? It's a place of honor for the pastor to be sitting up there on the platform. All this. Can you imagine something so small? But I've seen it happen. I've seen people leave churches over, you know, when we introduced contemporary music into this church, one person came up to me and said, pastor, you keep that kind of music going.

[19:59] You won't have a congregation. Another person left the church, went to another church that was one of the larger churches in the city and now is one of the smaller churches. And he great big facility because he could not stand the music. And so what I did, I went and had a little visit with him and explained to him the why behind what we were doing. And then he started coming back and he would come to the church, every service he'd wanna make sure I saw him and he'd come up and kind of look at me. And sometimes he would say, you know, I don't like this any more than you do. 'Cause I wasn't crazy about it either. But what's that got to do with anything? If it's going to help us reach the lost, is it making sense? And yet we get blinded by our own, comfort in the way what we're used to and what we've always enjoyed.

[20:50] And let me tell you this, the beautiful thing about all of this is we don't have to like it. Who says you gotta like whatever the change is, as long as that change is for a purpose that Jesus went to that cross for the lost world come to Christ, then whether we like it or not, as God's people who are full followers of Jesus Christ and we have surrendered our all to Him, then we will make whatever changes that need to be made in order to see what needs to be done needing to be. Now here's the problem. And I won't go in, I haven't got time to use illustrations here anymore, but I'll say this.

[21:37] I find as I go and talk about change, people love hearing about change. They love it until you try to change the thing they love and then you run into a problem. But when we are fully surrendered, when we've been willing to go a little further like Jesus and connect the dots, then whether we like it or not, we'll be willing to do whatever's necessary so that the church can be what the church needs to be. So He got in that place so He could pay the price. Now there's two things about this price. There was a word of refusal in order that He might do the work of redemption. And oh my, so many of us that have gone through change and have said, I'm going to do God's will, whether it's my cup of tea or not, we have had a word of refusal about some things back from the early, late seventies, early eighties.

[22:38] We were somewhat polarized here and part of it was my own doing. And they had the city in an uproar about what we were doing to reach the lost. And we had people in the church, a few people in the church that were also in an uproar about what was going on. And this boy was battle weary and battle worn. And I wanted to get outta here more than anybody wanted me outta here. And about that same time, I got a call to the largest church in our denomination in San Diego, California. And man, did that look good because the weather is the best in San Diego of any place on the face of the earth. I hate snow, I hate cold, and that would've been a, and then I could have respectfully got out of here and all the rest, but God would not let me go.

[23:26] And there was a price that had to be paid. Soon after we built this auditorium, had a man come here on the summer Sunday, he and his wife and he said, you remember me? I didn't remember him. He looked a little bit familiar. He said, we came here 30 years ago to talk to you about coming to pastor our church in San Diego. And listen, here's what he said. This is the way it works. He said, we would give anything to have a facility like this. Pay the price. God will bring the blessing, it'll be worth it all. And so the little tiny changes that we might need to make to get rid of our selfish interests are pretty small in comparison with seeing hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people being baptized and receiving Christ as Savior.

[24:18] So there is a price to be paid. And then when we pay the price, we will see the peace. We'll have the peace of seeing what God work in a way that God wants to work. There will be the commencing, there will be the ceasing of the battles in ourselves and maybe in the church, the ceasing of the battles in order to see the commencing of the blessing, the ceasing of the battles for the commencing of the blessing. Now when the battle ceases and everybody gets their focus on what Jesus went to the cross for, the lost world to be saved, and that's more important than anything else for the church, then the church will come together in unity.

[25:10] This church, when I was pastor, had all kinds of different factions in the church, but they weren't fighting factions because they were unified for the one most important purpose of the church. And that was to do anything and everything possible to see people come to Jesus. When I pastored this church, people would, excuse me, sometimes about wanting to just build an empire or build buildings or whatever. Listen, my calling was never to build buildings. My calling was never to raise money. Millions of dollars we had to raise. My calling was never about numbers. My calling was to see as many people come to know Jesus as we could possibly see come to know Jesus. And that meant we had to build buildings and we had to raise money in order to accommodate what God has called us to do.

[26:00] So how will we know when we've connected the dots? I want you to look in your Bibles to Philippians chapter 2 and verse 2. And here's what it says, "Then make my joy complete in being like-minded." The Bible says, having the same mind that was in you, which is also in Christ Jesus. That means it was never about Jesus and His wants and His likes, or He wouldn't have done what He did. And that's when I'm a full follower of Jesus. You see, being of one spirit and one purpose, the Scripture says, what's that purpose? It's to be in harmony. What? He went to that cross for the lost world. Be safe, do nothing of selfish ambition.

[26:50] No matter what the change is, no matter what I'm called upon to do, it's never going to be about me and my selfish interests and what I would be comfortable with. It's never going to be about that. It's going to be about His great and high and holy purpose. Pay the price to do the work of redemption, to get a word of refusal that we might not like in order to do the work of redemption. People ask me all the time when it's passion in this church, what makes this church continue to grow like it is growing and it still is growing because of the kind of leadership you have here today. And I say it's complicated, it's complex. But if you want me to give you a simple answer, here it is. Here it is. Our people have connected the dots.

[27:37] They've gone a little further than maybe most are willing to go for the sake of the most important purpose on the face of this earth. They've done that and it's, and they move from a thinking, a way of thinking. Is this what I like? Is this what I'm used to? Is this what I've always enjoyed? Is this the way I think it should be? Is this going to affect me in any way that I don't like? It's me, me, me, me that has no place in being a full follower of Jesus? Never. Our people for the most part move from that way of thinking to a way of thinking. Look, whether I like it or not, whether it's in my best interest, whether it would appeal to my selfish interest or anything like that at all.

[28:29] I know it's not about me. So whether I like it or not, if it's going to, whether it's my cup of tea or not, whether it's my comfort zone or not, whether it's gonna make me happy or my family happy or anything about that, that has nothing to do with anything. If it can help us see a lost world come to Jesus, I am for it. And I will stand behind wasn't what needs to be done, a word of refusal in order to do the work of redemption. Now what, how do we function? How do we act when that all happens in our lives? I preached several times in what's called the Point Church, where Kevin Matthews went from here, small church.

[29:17] When he went there, it just boomed. I mean, they had to go to two service in no time. There were all kinds of changes like you wouldn't believe. I remember Kevin telling me about this couple that didn't like the dress code. They always dress thought you should dress up in a suit and tie. The men did. And the women dressed to the ninth. And he said one time I wasn't dressed up, of course. And he said, this man, when he went out, he tugged on my shirt and he said, "A nice suit, which sure look good on you today." But he's, and of course Kevin, being Kevin, he just smiled and say, "Yeah, but you look good." But he kept on doing what he needed to do in order to connect with the people that they, this is small potatoes, I realized. But it's just one of the things. And pretty soon, no, happened pretty soon. Here it goes. This is the way it works. The family who had not been their children, who had never had not been attending church for years because it was outta touch, started attending their grandchildren, started coming.

[30:15] Pretty soon the children got saved and baptized and the grandchildren got saved and baptized because they were doing what was necessary to make it comfortable for the people that were trying to reach and not comfortable for ourselves. And God honored them. But I preached there, man, I could have got up. That church was so exciting. I could have got up and said Mary had a little lamb and they'd all clapped and cheered and thought it was great 'cause they just were full of excitement, anticipation. But not everybody. And Pastor Kevin sent me this communication card after I got back home and this person wrote this.

[31:01] I hope you got your thinking cap on. Everybody awake. Look pretty good to me. I can't see you in the balcony that well. This person said, wow, what an eye opener. I preached this kind of message. What an eye opener, a reminder of what we are here for. Amen. I had an awakening moment today. It is not about me. It is all about His will and the greater good if I focus so much on what I deserve. It's not about that at all.

[31:48] If I change my thinking, faith and perspectives, now here's it. Here's the clincher. Here's the country. This person said, God's will is what's best for me. That's where the peace comes when we've connected the dots. And there's not one thing about what we are comfortable with that's going to hinder getting done what God would want us to do. Now, I'm trying to close here and thank you for bringing that up. And you can play it loud if you want. And I look, cut me off, which I need to be cut off. I know I've gone, but I just, this may be my last sermon. Who knows? Anyway, when I think of that, it makes me think of a guy by the name of Peter Apples that some of the older people in the church have heard me share before.

[32:38] But there's so many new people, you haven't heard this, who fought in the Civil War. And his commanding officer gave the command to advance and then the enemy was too strong for them. So he was given the command. They were given the command to retreat. But Peter Apples was not the retreat in kind. It was not about him. It was about winning the battle. And he went a little further and he kept going across no man's land, and didn't get shot with everybody shooting him. But then he jumped down in a trench where all the enemy soldiers were lined up and he made contact with the enemy's first enemy soldier he saw, knocked him out. cold, threw him up on the ground, put him over his shoulder, headed back to his own company with all the enemy guns pointed at them, but they didn't dare to shoot for fear they'd shoot their own man. Now, you just think of the commanding officer, how he would've thought and felt.

[33:31] He didn't even know Peter Apples went over there. Peter Apples throws this enemy soldier down in front of him and the commanding officer said, "Where did you get him?" "Oh," he said, "over yonder there." He said, "There's plenty of them over there. You could have all had one if you had wanted one." My friends, there's thousands of people in this city that need Jesus. And if we can all get over ourselves and connect the dots so that it's never, ever about us in regard to anything that's going to help us to advance the cause of Christ, then we can see people reached with the message of the gospel, but never before.

[34:24] Look, now, I want you to see now. Look, see Joseph in the pit in the Old Testament. He went a little further. He stayed surrendered. And you look again, you see him second in command in Egypt, his dream was fulfilled that God had put in his heart. Look, now, it wasn't comfortable. It was an awful road to get there. But look, now you see Daniel in the lions' den. Look now again, you see him in the Prime Minister's chair. You look now at the disciples and being tortured and tormented and rejected and in pain and in jail and all that went with it. But they went a little further. They connected the dots. And you look again and you see a lost world, people all over the world coming to know Jesus because they paid the price.

[35:16] I say, look now. Look now. See what you see here. Look around, some empty seats. Look again. Look again. As we connect the dots, we go a little further. We will see this place packed to overflowing. And who knows what we'll have to do next in order to have space to reach the people that need Jesus more than anything else in this world.